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E A T U R E A R T I C L E
Making friends |
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When you're new to a place, it's normal to feel a bit lonely. Moving to another country or
attending a new school (if you're an exchange student you'll do both!) can be hard at first.
Is there anything you can do to help yourself feel more comfortable? Yes! Actively try to
develop friendships. Don't just wait, hoping that other people will invite you out. Remember,
most of the people around you already have an established circle of friends, and they may
not realize that you need to meet and talk with others.
When you are the newcomer, it's up to you to develop new relationships. As someone
who has moved around a lot, I've learned to view making new friends and acquaintances
as a sort of job. It's an important part of getting settled into my new community. It does
require effort, but the results are worth it.
If you're going to try to get to know people, you've got to find some first. The best thing to
do is join activities. Go to a club or team meeting at your school. Help with volunteer or
charity work in your new neighborhood. If you're the spouse of a student or expatriate
worker, there may be a social support group that meets for coffee or lunch sometimes.
If you have a child, you'll find lots of other parents to chat with at local parks. Not every
situation will lead to the making of close friendships, but you'll make some acquaintances
and start feeling more at ease in your new environment. Just start by introducing yourself,
make a little polite conversation. Be honest about your hope of meeting people and making
friends. You can even invite a new acquaintance to get together first. The important thing to
remember is to show that you have an attitude of confidence, enthusiasm and openness about
new experiences. A positive attitude will attract people to you, and you'll be on your way to
developing interesting friendships.
By Susan Ernenwein and Alice Hoover
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